Brent Alexis, O.Carm.
Over this past Christmas season there was an interesting series of reflections and other activities that focused on St. Thérèse’s “Christmas conversion” on this website. This concerned the moment in St. Thérèse’s life when she made the decision not to react in an immature manner when her family stopped placing Christmas presents for her in her Christmas stocking – a practice which was common in France at that time with children. I believe that St. Thérèse’s actions that Christmas reflects a spiritual practice that I have come to discover is essential to the Carmelite way of life – and in fact a key element to anyone wanting to live a spiritually mature life – the practice of detachment.
One of the most famous Carmelite Saints that even predates St. Thérèse is St. John of the Cross. A key spiritual teaching for which he is known is his emphasis on “nada” – which means ‘nothing.’ For St. John, he believed that attachment to created things is what prevents us from truly encountering God – we need to have nothing between us and God. This is a spiritual truth that I have come to discover transcends religious boundaries. I remember a few years ago while chatting with a very old Muslim Imam at a function I mentioned to him that I was a Carmelite. The Imam immediately exclaimed, “Ah yes, St. John of the Cross! I love his writings. Nada, nada, nada.”
In my own life detachment is something with which I continuously struggle. I think some of the biggest things that I have struggled to give up are the various images of what “my happy self” ought to look like. Before I entered the Carmelites, to be happy involved the image of me driving a new RX8 sports car, working for a dynamic company and dating a beautiful and intelligent woman, among other things. While I was in the process of making some of those goals a reality, I eventually realized that my true happiness did not reside in those accomplishments. In spite of this realization, it was still extremely difficult giving up this image of myself. While in religious life I still every so often start developing new images of what “my happy self” should look like. Now, however, it involves images such as working for a church based non-profit or attaining particular qualifications which I believe would be necessary for effective ministry. In spite of these things being very noble, I know that I can also become too attached to them as well.
But why detach in the first place? I believe that it is only by freeing ourselves of attachments that God’s grace can enter our lives in a dynamic way. One summer ago I had a very concrete experience of this. A few months before that summer period I was heavily involved in planning a conference in Trinidad for the Carmelite family there. I spent several hours developing schedules and communicating with the facilitator and other planners of the event – all including the fact that I would be there in a few months to help execute some of my plans.
A few weeks before the conference I was told that my superior wanted me to work in a hospital that summer! Naturally I was frustrated since it meant that I was not able to follow all of the plans which I had been working on for the previous months. In spite of my disappointment, I felt that God was calling me to practice detachment – but of course I was sure that it meant I would have had an absolutely miserable summer. To my amazement it was quite the opposite! That summer was a period of great growth for me as a future religious minister and as an individual as well. During my time there I also developed friendships with colleagues which have also proven to be invaluable. And, to top it all off, in spite of my absence, the conference was a great success. I guess St. Thérèse and St. John of the Cross were on to something after all.
* from http://www.carmelites.net/blog/